Monday, 18 February 2013


Filmmaking is something that's always interested me but never been something I've really wanted to do. I love films, I love watching films, I love analysing films, I love criticising films. I thought that was the main part of films that I'd love but as my course goes on and on, I find myself loving making films more and more. A rare thing to love something so much that's so creative and that I watch through my fingers while it's on the screen. It's an odd thrill of excitement, pride and embarrassment. Amateur productions rarely go the way you want them to and one of mine last semester had to have some major changes which ended up making it not as great as I hoped - as well as a bad song and a couple of bad shots. Either way, it got a high 2.1 which is obviously good.

Now this semester, instead of just making one short film, I have to make seven. In fact, I have to make seven in seven weeks. In a group of six, we're briefed on the Friday to shoot a film on the Monday edit within the week so it's ready for a screening session on the Friday. Now, the problem with this is there's no preparation as we're given it on the Friday and we have to wing it meaning we don't get to properly prepare. Although, I have to say, I've been quite lucky. I've moved to a group that works well together and we've made some films that, in my opinion, haven't been terrible - especially considering the short amount of time we have. Some have had really good parts but obviously there are negatives.

It's teaching me a lot about filmmaking, things I didn't even know. It's made me analyse in a different way when I'm in the editing suite. You have to try to make it flowing and not have shots jump or to have bad continuity and so on. Little things need the most attention. I'm, oddly, loving it though. I clench, I tense, I blush, I burn red with embarrassment at times but at others I look back and feel quite proud of what was accomplished and love doing the work. It's something that's spurring me on to want to do more. It's spurring me on to make something of myself. Or make something myself. It's making me want to become a part of the filmmaking side of things as well as the criticism side of it. I never expected that. Now I have a decision.

This is a check-in and a ramble. Tomorrow I'll be acting for the first time in the group's video as we have to switch around roles and what not. I had to act in my project last semester too and although I wouldn't say I'm an horrific actor - I can lie pretty well which is what it is - I was in that when I hadn't slept that night because I'm an idiot. But that went well. I did some Fincher angles cinematography wise which my marker said had cinematic moments. Now that made me feel good. The only thing left to learn is to edit. Avid you are on my list. All in all, all is well and good. I'm averaging a mid-to-high 2.1 for last semester and I'm determined to win an award at the end of semester and make a short film that I can look at it without nitpicking too many problems. Films are the fucking best.